Monday, November 24, 2008

Let's try it again, My love for you has no end

My inner prepubescent-self is squirming because on Wednesday night my sister and I will be crying our eyes out to this hotness:

I know, I know, you're totally thinking to yourself, "Fuck, those guys are like a fine wine!"

Or, maybe not.

Maybe you're thinking, "I hated those guys." If so, you're what I like to refer to as a "Nonbeliever". "Nonbelievers" often behave the way they do because of minimal New Kids education. I'll do my best to teach.

Many people don't know this, but Maurice Starr was the founder of the New Kids. He is also the founder of New Edition. So if you like New Edition, you basically like the New Kids. There, that was easy. If you're not sure if you like New Edition, let me educate you some more: You do.

New Edition busted out the hits "Mr. Telephone Man" and "Cool it now" and is comprised of Ralph Tresvant, BBD (aka Bel, Biv, and Devoe), Bobby Brown, and eventually Johnny Gill even joined the group. Look up their videos on Youtube and you'll realize that you don't like, but probably love, New Edition.

Just look at the similarities and you'll begin to understand how hip-to-shit the New Kids were:

And look at these:

I guess what I'm trying to get at is this: If you've ever danced to "Poison" or "My Prerogative" then don't act like you're too good for the New Kids, because you're not.

OK, so now that we're all believers, let me say this, I'm not sure what excites me more about this concert, the fact that I'll get to take revenge on my sister by screaming into her ear the entire time just like she did to me at their '91 concert in Fresno, or by proving once and for all to my mom that when I said "I love Joey McIntyre forever", I really meant it.

Anyhow, in honor of the greatness that is the New Kids, I present a small sampling of their career highlights:

1) Arsenio Hall - Everyone was talking junk about how the New Kids lip synced, and blah, blah, blah. Us true fans knew it was false, but just to prove the world wrong, they made an appearance on Arsenio. Skip to 1:46 if you want to see some Jordan falsetto Stylistics-inspired action.

2) Step by Step - Even if you were lame and a "Nonbeliever", you know this song. Don't lie. And while we're being honest, let's just put it out like it. You've hummed along to it. Hell, it's probably on your iPod as we speak.

3) This One's for the Children - There comes a point in every celebrity's career where they realize they better do something charitable lest they come off as assholes. This was the New Kids' answer to that.

4) NKOTB's Wildest Dreams - This was a TV special in which each of the New Kids got to act out their wildest dream. My sister and I obviously videotaped it and it's somewhere at my parent's house. In this clip Jordan plays one-on-one with Kareem Abdul Jabbar.

5) Natalie's Birthday Cake - This was more of a "Career Defining Moment" than it was a "Career Highlight".

Gadzooks, I can't wait for tomorrow to be "la la la la la la tonight". I already posted this on my myspace, but it's worthy of double posting. These two clips represent "Then" and "Now". When Jordan reenacts it during tomorrow's show, I may give a lil pee pee in my pants. "Every time we kiss, it always feels like this, baby I believe in you...."

That was then:

This is now:

Sorry for the epic post, but it had to be done. I leave you with two posters that adorned a certain 12 year old's bedroom walls:


NKOTB Valentine Girl, por vida

1 comment:

*super sucia* said...

sucia! you got the right stuff, girl! hope you have a *BLAST*